BASTARD
Wednesday 15th NOV 06 1:40am
I never knew how proud i was of my sister till 2 days ago. My sis asked me for help with her school's dance production DANZATION 2006. I don't get paid for it, naturally, but since it's my sister who asked, how can i say no right?
I believe that everything happens for a reason, the fact that i accepted this assignment gave me the opportunity to see and understand for myself just how hard my sister is working for her passion. It made me want to do my best, and just by being the Emcee for the show, i have in a sense made myself a part of the production. Life is full of suprises. And it's also full of lessons and adventure just waiting to be seen and heard. I have also got the good fortune to make several new friends. At the same time, get closer to people i already know. People like Alex Freshie, Shane, Kenneth, Sufan, Terence, Daphne Khoo, Ann etc etc. Thank you people, for just being there for me. I am proud of my sis, and all of you out there. It's a pity our time is so short lived. Maybe when fate permits, we will see each other again.
Back in my personal life, i have decided to make acting and Events Management my career in life. After doing Danzation 2006, i have decided that entertainment is what i like and do best. So why not make it my bread and butter too? Can always start small. As long as i can pay the bills and live a comfortable lifestyle, thats all anyone can ask for right?
I have decided to keep myself from "Him". It hurts me too much to see him and feel the way i feel knowing he will just slap me in my face again.
Besides, he is already showing signs that he is trying to distance himself from me already. He rarely speaks to me now as it is. And he even makes effort to avoid being alone with me. Am i so scary? Does he fear me so much?
I do not know if i can love again after him. Maybe in time i will.... but now, i'm a total wreck. I just want someone to love and love me back. So simple. Yet, i can never get it. Don't tell me to go get a girl cause it's honestly just so used and freaking insulting. I mean come on. THE WHOLE BLOODY WORLD is saying if you are a boy go get a girl. HOW THE FREAK is this helping ME?!
So WHAT if it's a girl? Just because it's the opposite sex makes it OK to love? and NOT the other way round? Just because it's the opposite sex means it's ok to kiss and touch and hold hands and hug and get your bloody dick hard and get shaggy with her? SHEESH people. REALLY. Give me a break!
But i'm fighting a losing battle aren't i? There are too many straight people around. Dosen't help that i dun look handsome either. The majority will always win. So, just conform? be a mental and emotional slave to the masses? Maybe that's the right thing to do, or is it just convinent? The worse part is, the closest people around me don't understand me. They just cannot accept.
People that means the whole world to me. Zax, Alan, Qing An, Isaac, Jon, Julius. They don't understand and they never will. Sad, when your own "family" just cannot accept who and what you are.
I have to let "him" go. Everytime i go out with him, with my other group of friends, he would say things like he likes this girl and that girl and he likes this and this, so and so. He never realises that i am stabbed inside. Not because of anything, just because of the fact that he is balantly telling me, "Stop dreaming, you bastard".
Yes. I'm a bastard.
You happy now?
EarlGrey
I never knew how proud i was of my sister till 2 days ago. My sis asked me for help with her school's dance production DANZATION 2006. I don't get paid for it, naturally, but since it's my sister who asked, how can i say no right?
I believe that everything happens for a reason, the fact that i accepted this assignment gave me the opportunity to see and understand for myself just how hard my sister is working for her passion. It made me want to do my best, and just by being the Emcee for the show, i have in a sense made myself a part of the production. Life is full of suprises. And it's also full of lessons and adventure just waiting to be seen and heard. I have also got the good fortune to make several new friends. At the same time, get closer to people i already know. People like Alex Freshie, Shane, Kenneth, Sufan, Terence, Daphne Khoo, Ann etc etc. Thank you people, for just being there for me. I am proud of my sis, and all of you out there. It's a pity our time is so short lived. Maybe when fate permits, we will see each other again.
Back in my personal life, i have decided to make acting and Events Management my career in life. After doing Danzation 2006, i have decided that entertainment is what i like and do best. So why not make it my bread and butter too? Can always start small. As long as i can pay the bills and live a comfortable lifestyle, thats all anyone can ask for right?
I have decided to keep myself from "Him". It hurts me too much to see him and feel the way i feel knowing he will just slap me in my face again.
Besides, he is already showing signs that he is trying to distance himself from me already. He rarely speaks to me now as it is. And he even makes effort to avoid being alone with me. Am i so scary? Does he fear me so much?
I do not know if i can love again after him. Maybe in time i will.... but now, i'm a total wreck. I just want someone to love and love me back. So simple. Yet, i can never get it. Don't tell me to go get a girl cause it's honestly just so used and freaking insulting. I mean come on. THE WHOLE BLOODY WORLD is saying if you are a boy go get a girl. HOW THE FREAK is this helping ME?!
So WHAT if it's a girl? Just because it's the opposite sex makes it OK to love? and NOT the other way round? Just because it's the opposite sex means it's ok to kiss and touch and hold hands and hug and get your bloody dick hard and get shaggy with her? SHEESH people. REALLY. Give me a break!
But i'm fighting a losing battle aren't i? There are too many straight people around. Dosen't help that i dun look handsome either. The majority will always win. So, just conform? be a mental and emotional slave to the masses? Maybe that's the right thing to do, or is it just convinent? The worse part is, the closest people around me don't understand me. They just cannot accept.
People that means the whole world to me. Zax, Alan, Qing An, Isaac, Jon, Julius. They don't understand and they never will. Sad, when your own "family" just cannot accept who and what you are.
I have to let "him" go. Everytime i go out with him, with my other group of friends, he would say things like he likes this girl and that girl and he likes this and this, so and so. He never realises that i am stabbed inside. Not because of anything, just because of the fact that he is balantly telling me, "Stop dreaming, you bastard".
Yes. I'm a bastard.
You happy now?
EarlGrey
1 Comments:
yay! I'm glad that you've finally find something you like to do!
Post a Comment
<< Home